12 September

So am thinking maybe the fact that I am breatheless is just a normal thing. I am still coughing up a storm but then so are many people in Cape town battling with their chests. The weight loss well I still have a ways to go so I will just embrace for the moment that I have no appetite and can loose weight really easily. The pain manageable with voltaren( love that drug) with a mixture of amarula and a sleeping tablet well the last two nights I have gotten over 5 hours, its cool I have felt better in the morning well until it wears off. But hey then I am at work and am so busy that I dont even have time to fart let alone focus on the pain. And then I heard this song and I thought well... may be this is the explaination

You leave me breathless
Oh the beauty of your presence
Oh the beauty of your face
You leave me breathless
You leave me speechless
You leave me falling to my knees
To hear You say you love me more Lord,
You leave me breatheless
You are so beautiful Lord
You are so beautiful Lord
To me


I would love to just close my eyes and be in His presence to fall asleep and be forever in the arms of my Saviour free from pain and sadness, Free from shame and guilt. Free to love endlessly, but I am awakened by the reponsiblities I have to my husband and children, especially my children, Ash wrting Matric tomoroow is her 40 day count down... its surreal - Jesse has a talent show this week - he is one amazing kid. Jason things finally seem to be coming together.

Listening to that song "I wanna be a billionaire" weird song...but it would be nice... but it just reminds me I must sort out my life cover tomorrow enough procrastinating...I must just do it along with the other billion things I have to remember... fetch bubba fron Fie( yah !!!! ) drop off Jesse application for Allan gray bursary, drop off Ash UCt app, finish homework for beyond abuse.... finish Kuzina August creditors... finish Wakame month end July and August.. finish stuff Bonnie needs so urgently ....Good thing my day starts at 8 with physio....and somewhere in there I should try fit in gym as well as finalise the summons for the Sheriff to deliver on Wednesday....Gosh no wonder I have to believe in the saying "Sleep when you are dead" this schedule may well kill me .... lol