Friday, March 21, 2014

Faithfulness and the greatness of my God

Wow the last 24 hours has been completely bizarre. Yesterday my precious 2nd born, and first born son Jason Michael Blignaut suffered his 3rd seizure. On January the 7th when he suffered his first seizure which I witnessed first hand. My first instinct was to call on the only name that I new and that was JESUS the second was to yell for my husband. As I yelled Jesus Jesus come now bring your peace bring your calm my husband came running(probably wandering why is mad portuguese wife was screaming)calling on God to restore calm and bring healing to her son. When he arrived and did all the basic first aid things like make sure Jason didn't choke put him in the recovery position, I ran to grab water and a cloth to cool him down. In the process I ran past my other son Jesse, on his way to check if his brother was okay, and in true unthinking Debbie fashion yelled at him that in no uncertain terms is he to go into his bedroom. This sent my other poor child into a complete tearful frenzy, my other child Ashleigh just calmly went to console her other brother who now was totally distraught because in my panicked unthinking state I had yelled at him, when all he was was concerned for his brother. Thankfully I have raised a level headed daughter who acted mature and calmly to console her baby brother. I returned to the room bucket and cloth in hand and proceeded to wipe my sons face and talk to him continually reminding him that he is loved more than he knows and that our great God was here in the room with us and that He is in complete control. I then proceeded to sing over my son the words I had sung 19 years ago all through my very brief labour with Jason. "Faithful God oh Faithful God you lift me up and You up hold my cause You give me life You dry my tears You are always near You're a faithful God" Oh in my mind it sounded like a sweet melody washing over my boy as he lay there in a state of deep sleep.I am sure to those around it was more like a cats' choir. AS the peace of God continued to descend and calm was restored, my son opened his eyes completely unaware of what had just happened, woke up and asked if it was the next day. His first words were "did I sleep the whole night and is it Uncle Kevin's birthday today?" Relieved that my son was okay, had not suffered a stroke and knew who he was I breathed a sigh of relief. We called our Cape Town family The Edwardians as they are affectionately know and told them what happened and asked them to pray. They arrived at our house in about seven minutes after that phone call. We all gathered around Jason as two families and called out to God for healing and peace. About an hour later my son and his buddy Anton joined our families in the lounge and Jason and Avril had some friendly banter about Manchester United and Chelsea and I knew my son was back and I breathed a quiet sigh of relief. But that was the start of a journey for me which last night took on a whole new perspective. I was busy finishing up at work. It had been a long and tiring day at Silikamva, and as I was dealing with a teacher my husband called. I hit the "I am busy button", he called again and I picked up my phone and answered what don't you understand by "I am busy". Not reacting to my rudeness he calmly sent me a text "Urgent" I sent the teacher packing and called him. He told me my son had suffered another fit and that he was now home and resting. I went into Debbie mode. I told him to get Jason to False Bay hospital that I would leave immediately and meet him there. I packed up and left the office in a whirl wind, trying to remain calm and in control. inside my head was screaming " God I know You whispered to me when this happened the first time that our children are a gift from you, they do not belong to us You have loaned them to us..." Well I was having major conversations with God as I sat stuck in traffic. I screamed at Him told Him I am not ready for this that he must heal Jason and restore him. I was crying so hard that I could bearly see through my tears. I then called Andre and told him that we must go straight to Groote Schuur and not False Bay as we already had a referral letter for the 14th of April for a cat scan. Andre told me that Jason had just suffered another seizure at home when they were about to leave for the hospital and that he would wait for me to get home and that we would go together. While driving my friend Sandy Fisher what's apped me to say that they were praying for Jason. I called her a burst into tears, she asked if her husband Josh who is a doctor could help, I said he must phone Andre at home, she then proceeded to pray for me, which completely undid me and the tears flowed again. Traffic home was insane it was like some cruel joke, I crawled up Constantia nek bawling my eyes out and wishing that I had a car like the one from Harry Potter that I could just hit flight mode. But I did't so I phoned my daughter, told her to pray for her brother, then I phoned my sister and told her to call my mom and what was happening and then proceeded to beg God to clear this traffic so that I could just get home. I did get home, an hour later to find my son now relaxed and lying on the couch, Avril was sitting having a beer and my amazing husband was packing Jason's bag feeding the dog and just being his usual practical self. I don't even think I kissed him hello. And so we left for Groote Schuur. On the way we chatted about what we would do if we got there and they were unhelpful. We decided we would if necessary cash in all the money we had saved sell my car do whatever it took to go to a private hospital. We also prayed after that that we would be treated well and speedily at Groote Schuur that we would see God's favour upon us and that Jason would quickly get the help he needed. So on the one hand we were willing to bankrupt ourselves again, and on the other hand we just put it out there to God that we would like His help and favour. Aren't I glad that God doesn't depend on my stupidity. Of course He showed favour, of course He was faithful because that is His nature. He is faithful even when I am faithless. We arrived about 6.30pm at Emergency, I took Jason in while Andre went to park, We were 4th in the queue. it took about forty minutes for doctor to see us. The doctor happened to be a member of our churche's Rondebosch PM congregation. He was amazing treating Jason with dignity and such amazing professionalism. Once again I stood in awe at our Government hospital's I had been super impressed by False Bay last Friday when I went with Jason for his first appointment, once again I was super impressed with Groote Schuur. Grateful to God for His provision of an amazing young Doctor who not only could relate to my son and his condition, but understood my worry as a mother and we were helped swiftly and painlessly. It was confirmed that Jason probably has epilepsy and was immediately put on to appropriate medication. He will go for his scan as planned on the 14th of April. We got home just after 9pm. My son had a bite of pizza and then went straight to bed. He sleeps peacefully now. Tomorrow and the days to come will hold some challenges, he will not be allowed to drive for 6 months, or at least until we feel that he is stable on his medication. This will involve some changes as Andre and I will need to be more available to cart him to his work shifts, he works as a waiter for Peddlars part time, he continues to be very involved at Commonground. We will have to rely on friends to help cart him to and from his church functions as well as be available ourselves to do this. Small sacrifices in the greater scheme of things. SO glad that I will have a weeks holiday soon, so we will ease into our new routine, how gracious of God. So thank you to all who prayed,support us and will continue to do so as we journey in this life, holding on to the hope we have in Jesus. He is our anchor our strong foundation,our friend,our Redeemder, Forever Faithful, we will worship Him.