My daughter is now 29, and has purchased her own flat and lives in Seapoint. She left home as soon as she graduated and started her first job, she was just 23! When she started her articles she came to her dad and I one Sunday afternoon, and told us she is moving out to be closer to her work place and would rather pay rent somewhere else and save on time and petrol. I sat in a state of shock for about two weeks but soon realised that this was the right move for Ashleigh. This "child" was soaring, recently graduated and doing her articles with PWC she was independent and going places! She needed to cut the apron strings.
Upon completing her articles she hit us with another bombshell, she had been approached by BDO Gatwick and was moving to London!
I had just gotten used to her hardly visiting home and living in another part of the city, when she came home one Sunday for lunch and announced that she was being interviewed for a job in the UK and if she got it she would be leaving in January to start in the February. I knew I should be excited for her, and her dad was ecstatic because he had always wanted his children to travel and explore the world! She amazed me and settled into London Life and work like a duck to water. She loved it and the easy accessibility of travel to the continent.
Jesse went into residence at UCT at the start of his undergraduate degree, He too like his sister had received a full bursary to study accounting through Thutuka. This meant that Andre & I were released from having to pay anything. It was truly a blessing. It did mean however that they had to stay in residence at UCT.Jesse was not a fan of res and he alway came home for weekends because res food was abominable! This was a nice comfort for me, I loved having my children and their friends in my home, I have always wanted my home to be a safe space where my children and their friends could be relaxed fed and happy. This however did not happen for long, as Jesse met the love of his life Heather Daly and she stayed in a flat close to the varsity, so Jesse started coming home less frequently on weekends. He was very involved with youth work and his holidays would often be mission trips away. When he graduated he had already decided in undergrad that he would look to Johannesburg to do his articles. Heather was from Jhb and so he pursued the Johannesburg work option now with new purpose. I knew in my heart that Jesse, once he met Heather and knew that she was going to be his wife, that he had already cut the apron strings.
This was my baby and my heart ached as I saw our relationship shift. He was accepted into the Nedbank programme for articles 1 of 11 students chosen out of 1000. I was extremely proud, and again grateful that he would be in a city where I had family. So last year January he packed up everything and left for Jhb. He had secured a flat with a close varsity friend just ten minutes from Heather’s family home. In the March he called us to say he was going to ask Heather to marry him, I was so surprised, because he had always said he wanted to finish his studies and own a home before he took a wife. Clearly he was smitten, so in April of 2021 in a surprise proposal he asked Heather to marry him and she said YES! They were married in November in a beautiful ceremony at Hartebeespoort Dam. It was a very happy day for me.
Jason had a later start to university than his siblings. He did a year of mission with Commonground Church his first year after school. The following year he had a health setback and we suggested to him to wait and defer university until the following year. He worked as a surf coach and a waiter. The following year he was accepted in to UCT for a Bachelor of Social Sciences. Despite his health issues Jason did extremely well at university. He was focused and passed well, while continuing to work as a surf coach, lead worship and serve alongside in the youth. He is a gifted worship leader and musician. In his final semester at university he had a seizure in the lecture theatre, fortunately his brother was on the other side of the campus and Jesse got there in lighting speed to be with Jason until we were able to get there. This really knocked Jason’s confidence. His seizures had in the past happened at home, and so this was difficult for him. He withdrew a bit and became more of a homebody. Friends were also unkind, and spread rumours that were untrue. But my boy is resilient like his father, he has gone from strength to strength. He studied further after university and completed the Tefal course and was all set to go teach English in China when the pandemic brokeout This was frustrating for him, but he quietly plodded on and then was offered a job with a Digital innovation company DYDX in April of last year. He has done so well and I am extremely proud of him. This past Monday we went to see the area where he has purchased a flat. As we drove home my heart swelled with pride seeing this young man with all the health challenges he has endured, thriving! Sadly I only have a few months left with him livingat home with us, as next year February his place will be ready and he too will leave home! He has been an incredible support with his Dad this year, as Andre has been extremely ill. I am grateful that he has been present in the home, I have needed his physical strength to help with Andre. Although he and I clash heads a lot I am deeply grateful for the support he has been. Sometimes he heads off to his girlfriend for the weekend and his presence is sorely missed!. He and I are like mirror images of each other! For now though I will enjoy the last few months of having my last kid at home.
I will wait patiently….. as one day this home will again be filled with the laughter and squeals my future grandchildren.
Although my children seem anti kids right now…. I know they will all make great parents and I know all in God’s time the noise and fun of little feet will fill my home once again ...in the future.
